Monster Bingo 3.0

[thisismagrave]

Monster Bingo Overflow! Card Harpy and Card Nymph.

Let me know if you're interested in spice with someone whose never had spice.

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[ends]

... If I give you an answer to that, it'll only be my answer. And it might not even be a complete one.

[ he tucks some of his own hair aside after he lightly taps the side of his head, a quiet indication of something with his head. no memories. still missing too many.

but, he does have a square asking him to reveal a regret, and he had been far better at revealing and uncovering emotions then he had been at pranking people or doing typical prom night activities. ]

As far as I can tell, when I was alive, I was... the type of person who was worth nothing. I just existed because I was too stupid or too afraid to do anything else. I couldn't connect with anyone or... feel much of anything.

I'm not sure if that changed. And... then I wasn't alive anymore. I lost all my memories then, too. I was told it's normal for people who die from blunt force trauma to arrive to the afterlife with amnesia.

[thisismagrave]

[Worth nothing]

[There is a tension at that because...he knows that feeling. He is Terrified of that feeling. Is he worth anything, what can he do, how can he be useful-]

It was different, when you died?

[ends]

I wasn't connected with anyone when I was alive. I don't remember any parents or anyone looking out for me. If I didn't have money for food, I didn't eat. If I didn't have a job, I wouldn't have a room to stay in.

I just existed, and I didn't know why. Then, I... didn't. I... regret it, I guess.

[ despite what he says, his delivery is extremely flat: it is a mere statement of what he knows to be true thus far. he doesn't know how he died, not definitively, or why. ]

I died, and I know there was at least once where... I was able to reach someone that was lost, someone that had been discarded when he was alive. So, I'm... going to fight like hell to hold onto that feeling. If I get hurt in the process, fine. I'll be able to live knowing I did more than just sit by and exist.

[ noting the tension, he merely rests gently against Rufous. then, he looks down for a moment, his eyes narrowing a little until he pinches the bridge of his nose. no, there's something else. he's working it out. ]

[thisismagrave]

[His hand moves to his cheek again, and...he understands that. That need for connection. The little bit of praise, the belief, the trust. He wanted to do so much for that feeling. Even at the risk of disappointment and anger.]

[And more than that...]

[Those feelings were so familiar. It made his chest hurt how much he just understood. Understood him and understood the person he helped.]

Its important...to have a worthwhile existence. To matter. [His voice is soft.] To have someone look at you and be happy you're in their life.

[He looks up.] I need to groom someone else. Let me return the favor.